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serendipity


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please help!! I have no idea WHERE to even start
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I don't even know where to begin, so here goes my attempt at a short version.

  I am currently in the process of getting my niece into a preschool\daycaee. She's been on a waiting list for acap and I was told she was a priority on the list since she's in foster care. It's a relative placement working on adoption but she's still considered in foster care so the state has very strict rules fo caregivers when there's a f.c involved.

I'm glad. Protect first. Always.  

So here's what I'm having trouble with. I never put my children in daycare. I'm always had a nanny or family members to help here are there. It was a struggle to find safe and reliable care. That's part of why I started doing what I could go help families that were having the same issues I was. I'm  not physically well. So after 10 years of families coming and going I had to decide to keep my niece or keep helping. My body decided for me before I could !make myself push through it.

Sorry off topic.  My niece is a full time job. I have always been very good at creative solutions and never once yelled at a child. However my niece wears me out to the point of wanting to run away and hide. Just for a nap. She's very active and due to her lack of care from her parents she now will extremely over act to everything and likes to scream and slam doors. She's 3 almost 4. 

She needs to be in a careing understanding and loving environment where people will take the time to talk her down from her frustration s and calmly help her understand her emotions.she never stops asking questions and will ask you that thing multiple times and not once listen for your answer.

I'm working with the doctor to get her properly evaluated to see if she's struggling with something more than the anger of missing her parents.

The case worker got approval for daycare a few days a week to help the struggle I have with being completely run down. I don't have help. I can't just drop her with the grandparents or aunt. I'm it. Just an idea of how "spirited" and  exhaustive. I had to hide in the bathroom with the door locked and head phones on the loudest volume and she's standing outside the door calling my name. Just cause I'm not allowed to leave her sight. I trip over her cause she stays right on my butt. All day. Everyday. 

So if anyone knows where I start to find the right care for her?

Anyone with any information that's helpful I'm greatful.

Im new here so I'm not sure how people are but please keep any negative feedback or suggestions about how I can change her behavior. 

Thank you for any and all help 



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Tina
MaryFerguson


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I would  suggest that  first you try to find out whether she likes interacting with  other kids, take her to nearby park and encourage her to play with other kids of her age. Its better that you try to keep her out most of times so that she won't cling to you much.I think once she likes outside and makes couple of friends she will calm down and be relaxed. Also look for daycare where they plan more outdoor activities rather than indoor ones, in this way she will be able to interact with other kids more.One such dayhttp://callingallkidstoo.com/



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Mary Ferguson
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It's important for both you and your niece to have some structure in your day. I would start this even before she goes to daycare. Her life has been pretty jostled around lately with all of her changes. So, knowing what to expect on a day-by-day basis will do her some good. I recommend printing out a daily picture schedule (here's a link to one I like: http://www.andnextcomesl.com/2014/04/free-printable-daily-schedule.html)  and hanging it where she can see it, refer to it, make small choices about her day and ask questions about it. This way she can feel some independence, empowerment and control over her day. Make sure when you are scheduling things that it is something that works for you as well. The goal here is to make a daily plan that fits both of you. I'm sure she needs a lot of support and one on one time with you because of all the changes she has experienced lately. However, scheduling nap time, play time alone and with other children (all things done without you) is going to be important for your health. Remember, no body is perfect, try and enjoy each day by finding a quiet moment to reflect. Good luck, you can do it!

 

-TeacherTeacher



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donnamartin


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I would like to suggest you to keep talk with her teacher about what she does at preschool, and than have a healthy discussion.



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Cynthia

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Hi Tina,  I totally understand bc my 3 1/2 yr old is always up my butt, has constant frustration fits and asks me things until I am blue in the face!  He is a repeater as wel.  I tried a DayCare Center and they just did not make me comfortable since my son is kinda high maintenance and I do not feel that he would do well under the supervision of a girl who looked like she just graduated from college and really has no experience!  Originally I had him at a In-Home DayCare where he was getting used to other kid, but I could not afford to keep him there and now that I have help, his spot is take.  I am just beside myself bc I need to get back to work but I can't just leave my son with just anyone, especially since he has special need.  If you have found any information from this post or on any other site could you please pass on information to me!  I would greatly appreciate it and I wish you the best with your niece!

 

Cynthia



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Anonymous

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